Starting to live
by jebony233
Summary: This is kind of what I saw after I read Eclisp. It's basically Bella and Edward starting their life together. Not to sure of the title right now. This is my first story so be honest but please be gentle.
1. worries

It's been such a long time since the battle, since all my friends risked their lives in a war that was completely over me. Clumsy, goofy, normal me. The weeks have felt like years, yet the events are still so clear in my mind. And then I think of Jacob all broken up on his way-to-small-bed. I remember the look in his eye when I told him I really did love him. I also remember the look in his eye when I told him it didn't make a difference. I usually don't have time to think of all these things. Edward is always by my side. Thankfully. And Alice is constantly badgering me with wedding details, Ugh! Lord knows I love Edward to death, it's marriage I'm not so fond of (courtesy of my mother)...How am I going to tell her?

For a while Edward didn't say anything about my intense silence. I was driving after all, maybe he figured I was trying to concentrate and not crash to my death, as with my luck would probably happen.

"Are you okay Bella? You seem really quiet."

"Oh am I, sorry..."

"Nothing to apologize for," he interrupted, " I'm sorry continue."

"Just running through wedding details." He gave me a look that told me that he didn't buy my story.

"Bella!" he was almost whining as he prodded me for more information. "Isn't it bad enough that I don't know what your thinking when your lying? Please tell me what's _really_ on your mind, don't torture me."

I let out a big huff of air, and turned the car off the road. "...I've got a lot of things on my mind." I wanted to leave it at that but I knew he would want more even before his gorgeous golden eyes started to beg. "I was thinking about the wedding...as well as the battle that just passed, and my mom. All of these things are happening one after the other, it's pretty hard to keep up with." I guess it felt good to get some of this off of my chest except for the fact that I knew what he would say next. I saw the guilt in his eyes, but before I could stop him he was already rushing the words out of his mouth with all the grace he possessed.

"Bella if this is all too much for you right now you don't have to do anything. I already told you it's okay really. If you don't want to do the wedding right now then..."

I interrupted him with a kiss. I caught him in mid-rant and was glad to see the shock in his eyes.

"None of that. We are in the middle or the end actually of planning this wedding. I already told our friends and Charlie. It's happening right now." I pulled him closer, "Nothing is going to get in the way of what we _both_ want."

I kissed him again. His cold lips lingered a little longer this time and sent a chill down my spine as my heart raced. He smiled his gorgeous crooked smile.

"OK. If your sure." He sighed, "Let's get going then." It all seemed to happen in a second; as soon as I got out of the car he slung me around to his back and was dashing through the woods. With everything that was going on lately I needed a nice sunny day that we could spend in the meadow. As soon as we arrived I climbed off his back and sat directly in the middle of the clearing.

I sighed. "It's so soon." I didn't realize it but my mouth tilted up in the faintest smile. Edward did. He was by my side immediately. He ran his fingers around my lips, to my cheek, up my hairline and back.

"You're smiling." It sounded like a statement, but there was a hint of a question in his tone. I realized my smile now as well.

"Hmm I guess your right I am." I closed my eyes as his hand still swept across my face. I let the full sense of the moment set in. His cold hand on my skin, the sweet fragrance of his being, the very essence of him that made his touch to irresistible to shy away from. I smiled fully this time. "I really am."

"And you're happy?" I opened my eyes in shock at his question. His eyes looked so sincerely intent on what I was about to say.

"Are you crazy!" His eyes were shocked, then they changed they almost looked sad. I took his face in my hands. "There aren't words to describe how uncontrollably happy I am with you. After all this time, after everything we've been through...you still have to ask. Hmph!" I turned my face away from him and there was a moment of silence. I almost thought he left. I quickly turned my head back, but he was still there. Smiling, beaming actually. Like all the little diamonds that glistened off his skin grew ten times brighter because of his smile. He swept me into his arms and held me so close to his body it felt like he was trying to fuse us together. He breathed in deeply and let out a sigh of relief.

"So after all this drama...I mean with all the pressure you're still genuinely happy?"

"I could be," _have been_ I noted silently," looking death in the face, and as long as you were with me I'll always be genuinely happy. You are ridiculous to think otherwise." I whispered in his ear, "I love you, you know that. Don't ever second guess it." He pushed me back a little and kissed the skin directly under my ear.

"I love you, so much I'm surprised the cosmos haven't screamed it out." he whispered back into my ear. I heard him breathing in deeply as he was still by my ear. " There was a reason for the question Bella." I could hear the the hesitation.

"What is it?" I was scared there wasn't much he hesitated to tell me unless I was in danger. He sighed.

"It's your mom."


	2. breaking the news

**A/N**

Disclaimer: I wasn't sure if you had to do this or not so let me do it now: I do not own any rights to the story of twilight or any of the sequels, they are all the property of Stephenie Meyer.

I love this series and have all these ideas I really wanted to get out so please reply.

Chapter2

"My mom? What! What do you mean?" I was taking short shallow breaths. Not enough air was coming in and I felt light headed. I remember how I felt when I told Charlie about the wedding: _Edward came over about twenty-five minutes after Charlie came home, trying to keep it as nonchalant as we possibly could-we didn't want to make it seem like we were waiting for him to get here. Charlie was just about to go get seconds of the stroganoff I made for him when Edward rung the doorbell. I tried not to look anxious when I went to get the door. I looked deep into his deep golden eyes, I needed him for support I had no idea how Charlie was going to take this. He smiled at me and grabbed my hand then led me to the kitchen. Charlie smiled at us; he was over being upset with him ever since graduation Charlie was a lot nicer to him. _

_"Hello Edward." Edward seemed extra charming as he flashed a smile at my dad, he squeezed my hand again as I got stiffer._

_"Charlie. How was your day?"_

_"Pretty good thanks." We sat down across the table from him and just looked at him. We had come to an agreement that I should be the one to start the conversation. After a minute of silence Charlie looked up at us with his mouth full, his eyes were waiting, and growing worried he felt the stress of the situation._

_"Dad, I…well we have something to tell you something." He didn't move, he didn't swallow, I wasn't even sure if he was breathing. " Um you see, I'm…well we're…um. We're getting married!" I closed my eyes shut tight, I really didn't want to see his expression, I wasn't sure if he really forgave Edward or if he put on a show for me. I felt movement that's good at least he didn't stop breathing. I opened my eyes as Edward started to speak._

_"Charlie I know this must be hard for you to believe. And I know how you were affected when you saw how bad Bella was when I…" he flinched slightly probably knowing exactly how my dad really felt more than I ever would, " When I left. But I'm not going to leave her ever again. I am too selfish with her to ever be that far away again. You see, I love her so much, and I plan to stay with her for as long as she'll take me." I whispered forever, and Charlie looked at me then stared at him, probably shocked that he gave a perfect response to what he was thinking. He finally swallowed the bite that was in his mouth and let out a huff of air._

_"I thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant he tried to joke then got serious again. "Edward you're right I don't trust you just yet." He looked at me and sighed again. "I think it would be better if you waited until after college, give her a chance to broaden her horizons. See other fish you know. Marriage is a big step, she should have options…"_

_"I don't want options!" I interrupted maybe a little to emotionally for the situation at the moment, " Dad I love him only him. And I want to be with him forever."_

_"No you want to be with him forever now." He looked at Edward with a pained expression and I knew where his train of thought was. It was hundreds of miles away in Florida with my mom and her new husband. I let out a hurt scoff. I knew what I was going to say would sting him a little but he did it first._

_"I am not mom." I said very deliberately. "I love Edward. Without him things don't make sense for me. And…I don't want to wait." I went to grab my father's hand and he reached out for mine. "Dad you don't need to worry about me. Not about Edward either." I squeezed his hand. " We love each other very much, you have to feel it when you're with us. It's strong. I know you know that." I was searching his eyes for something to click, it never did._

_"Yeah I know." He sighed. "I guess there's nomore to say." He let go of my hand and walked toward Edward. He paused for a second and put his hand on his shoulder. "Congratulations." He looked toward me. " To you both. I'm not saying I'm completelyok withthis, but…you have my blessing... It's not like it would change anything if I didn't, huh?" he asked joking again but realizing how true it really was. His eyes glossed over._

"_Um, if you kids have plans that ok there's a game on tonight so…" He walked out of the kitchen leaving the rest of his sentence in his head, and his half finished plate on the table._

_Edward had a small smile on his face that could've been because he was consented or it could've been what Charlie was thinking. I never asked. I just stood up and led Edward out of the house. The easiest part had past._

Edward was inches from my face his sweet scent engulfed me. I think he was trying to calm my breathing, but it didn't work. It actually made it worse. I managed to cough out. "When?"

"In a few weeks Charlie called her early this morning."

"Oh God he didn't tell her did he?" I was near hysteria.

"Bella calm down please! And no he didn't tell her anything. Just that he thought she should visit…but yes he has intentions of her finding out when she arrives. One way or the other."

"Great so it a you tell her or I will situation." I took a few deep breaths to control my breathing.

"You still sure about this?"

"Absolutely." I said weakly. I lay down across the meadows grassy floor. He propped himself on his elbow next to me. "And after the wedding?" I asked I was sure he knew what I meant. He grabbed my hand.

" I will do everything you ask." He kissed my palm. "From your strongest demands, to your silliest request. Forever." He started kissing up my arm; his cold lips left a tingling sensation wherever they met my skin. It sent currents through my body. He skipped my throat and went straight to my jaw. I kissed his bottom lip.

"I can't wait."


	3. Help

A/N: Hi I'm really psyched with the story if it gets to be kind of like rambling tell me I'll try to control my self. Characters owned by Stephenie Meyer (Still not sure if I have to do this or not bear with me)

**Chapter3**

We stayed at the meadow for most of afternoon. I didn't want to leave but Edward insisted on getting me something to eat. The Cullen's stocked their fridge with food just for me (it made me feel like a burden but they insisted that while I was human they had no problem feeding me.) I was anxious to get there. I needed to talk to Alice. I wanted to know what was going to happen with my mom. I just want to be prepared for whatever it is that will happen.

When I walked into the house Alice was standing in the doorway waiting for us. She danced toward me and gave me a big hug, she tried her hardest to restrain herself but I still felt crushed among her small body.

"Hi Bella!"

" Hey Alice." I said, though my air supply was seriously lacking at the moment. She let me go.

"Oh sorry," she giggled. "You are not going to believe it, and your going to love me!" I seriously doubted that. " Everything is set Bella." Edward groaned but she just shot him a dark look and continued, "The church, the invitations, you already have your dress, I even got a caterer! Everything is just perfect, now if you guys would just make up your mind about the date I could send the invitations." She wanted to go on I could hear it but I'm not sure if I could handle wedding details right now, my skin was getting pale.

"Alice," Edward cut in, "Please not right now. Look at her she's pale as a ghost." Alice gasped.

"Oh my god! Bella! Are you all right? Bella, come on your scaring me!"

"Caterer…what…how?" I tried to gasp out. "Alice this is supposed to be a small reception. And didn't we say we weren't going to get married in a church. You promised! You said you wouldn't go all crazy with this. What did you do invite the entire town?" I wanted her to feel a little remorse, but she kept her composure and smiled at me.

"Calm down Bella, you're going to hyperventilate. Of course I didn't invite the whole town. You don't know everyone in Forks." 

"That's not funny."

"And any way you have to get married in a church, it's like tradition. I invited some extra people other than the people you told. Like only fifty people extra. So it is still technically a small reception, and caterers do cater for small events. This is very restraining restrictions your trying to force me upon Bella, be reasonable." I sighed; I don't know why I try to argue with her you can't win.

"Any way that isn't the most important thing I need to talk to you about." Edward went into the kitchen, to make me some food and to let me talk to Alice. "My mom is coming here in a few weeks." I had urgency in my voice but her eyes didn't grasp any of that.

"Oh really that is so awesome. Then she can help with the wedding details!" Her eyes lit up.

"Alice! She doesn't know about the wedding. And I thought you said all the details were taken care of."

"Date!"

"Ugh! That's not the point. Alice, how is she going to take it? She isn't the fondest person of marriage at a young age, being victim of it herself. Is she going to explode when I tell her? Will she be calm? She's not going to disown me is she?" 

"Um, well let's see…it might not be that easy. I don't know your mom well and I'm not attuned to her thoughts. It might take some time to find out, maybe if she were closer to me."

"Are you sure, I need this. I'll go crazy if I have to go into this blind."

"I can try, I did meet her once right." She blanked out and I knew she was searching for something, anything that would help me out. Edward came back with a plate of food he had prepared. As he gave me the plate he stared at his sister. We moved to the dining room and waited for her. He sat across from me and watched as I ate. I tension radiating off of me filled the room.

"It's going to be ok, I promise you, you don't have to worry." I nodded and continued to eat.

"I know, but I can't help being anxious. It's my mom. I can only imagine what she'll say." I was finishing eating when Alice came into the room, there was a calm on her face.

"Well the wedding I still see happening, and your mom is there. That's all I got. She doesn't look angry. But she also doesn't look ecstatically happy either, more like accepting. Kind of like Charlie."

"So we still don't know exactly how she'll take it. But she will be there." I nodded to myself. "That's a start."

"I could try to see some more."

No it's ok, I can deal with this. She'll be here, and eventually she will understand how much we love each other." Edward smiled at me from the other side of the table and was by my side in an instant.

"Come on I'll take you home." He kissed my forehead and took me to the car. My mind was miles away from here. It took me a minute to realize that Edward had grabbed my hand and we were outside of my house.

"Oh!" I said taking the moment in and laughed. "Wow I blanked out for a minute."

"It's ok, are you alright?"

"Yeah," I nodded, "I'm good." I squeezed his hand back and reached for the door handle. He never let go of my hand. I looked back at him confused. "Aren't you coming?"

He smiled, "Yeah, just wait a second." I closed the door and looked at him with expecting eyes. It took a long moment for him to speak again. " I'm just worried about you," He said answering the question he saw in my eyes. "This is a lot of stress on you, I can feel it." He leaned in closer to my face and smiled. "If at any time you need a break, from anything: Alice, wedding details anything, tell me and I'll take you out for as long as you need. We don't need you having an anxiety attack."

"Thanks Edward that sounds nice. I'd go anywhere with you. Under any circumstances." I smiled. "But your unnecessarily worried I'm nowhere near the peak of pressure I can endure."

"And we're keeping you far away from that peak. Promise?"

"Promise." I kissed him he seemed gentler today. More than he usually was. It was a weird feeling. He pulled back and we went inside the house. With the faintest feeling of worry emanating from him but I couldn't figure out why. 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Charlie wouldn't be home for at least another hour, and I decided to warm up the spaghetti I made yesterday so I could spend some alone time with Edward. After I finished preparing Charlie's plate I went by to check the messages from the phone. One was from Angela asking about wedding details that pertained to her, and she just generally wanted to know what I was up to. Jess also called but left a message that quickly beeped off while she was in mid sentence. Then there was a message from my mom: "Charlie you have me worrying now. What's going on? Is there something wrong with Bella, why are you being so secretive? And why haven't I talked to Bella?" Edward was by my side as my mom ranted on to Charlie about how childish his behavior was. He placed a sturdy hand on my shoulder. My hand reflexively reached for it, my heart was beating triple time.

"Bella," he whispered in my ear, "You promised."

I took deep relaxing breaths, "Your part of the blame. You know how my body reacts when you touch me." He let his hand fall; just as soon as it did I took it back in my hand and placed it on my shoulder. " I didn't ask you to stop!"

"I don't want you having a heart attack." He placed his hand on my heart as my moms voicemail finished. "Goodness Bella! Calm down!"

I took more deep breaths. "It doesn't help…with you…_yelling_ at me." I said trying to sound cold but failing because of the breathiness of my voice.

He smiled crookedly at me. "_You_ were scaring me. I was simply trying to get my point across."

I glared at him.

"You didn't have to yell." I added.

"Would it help if I apologized?"

"No."

"I'm sorry anyway." His voice was thick with sincerity but I still heard the humor in his voice. I hated that he could persuade me so easily.

"Whatever." I huffed and listened to the last message it was from Billy. He was inviting Charlie over to spend the day at his house, and nonchalantly invited me. I sighed.

"It's ok if you go you know." Edward eyes were intent on reading mine, but I didn't let any of my emotion leak through them this time.

"No I'm good…I don't need to torture the poor guy, it really is better if I stay here." Besides I told him everything was happening rather soon so he would probably take me coming over there as a sign of hope which it wasn't.

"You don't have to stay for my sake."

"I'm not!" I snapped playfully at him. He smiled and kissed my forehead.

"How about that vacation?"

"Hmm, tempting but we have to much stuff to do. Wedding stuff, my mom stuff, and plus I want to have a lot of personal time while all this stuff is going on." I got on my tiptoes and placed my lips to his. I lingered there a while waiting for him to either give in or push me back. While I waited I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled his body closer to mine. And then he finally reacted, he ran his fingers through my hair, and lifted me up off my tiptoes till my feet were inches off the floor. My body reacted immediately; lately he wouldn't take anything this far trying to keep me from thinking he was going back on our compromise, my heart started racing uncontrollably. I needed to gasp for air but I didn't want to break the contact we had. I waited for any change in his behavior, I realized he was taking in shorter breaths as well, but they wouldn't affect him the way they would me. The room started spinning, but I still didn't want to let go, he didn't realize my lightheadedness because he was holding me up. But when I'd fainted, just for the slightest second, he was instantly aware.

"Bella!" I smiled lightly at the sound of his voice. "Are you ok?" There was definite panic in his voice.

"Yeah I just didn't want to let go." I smiled at him but he looked slightly upset.

"Bella, you're going to kill yourself! God, isn't it bad enough you have bad luck we don't need you trying to kill yourself too!" I smiled again. Edward sighed, "You _are_ hopeless." Edward placed me back on the floor holding me steady.

"I'm sorry I don't mean to worry you." I said still dizzy from the faint.

"Yeah that's the most important thing to worry about, upsetting me." He rolled his eyes at me. I still had butterflies in my stomach, and wasn't really listening to his rant. I leaned up to kiss him again. He kissed me quickly then quickly pulled back. "Who knows what will happen next time I kiss you like that."

"You're right…we should find out." He smiled at me.

"_Maybe_ later." He emphasized maybe. I let out a huff of defeat I knew there was no point in trying to argue him while I was looking into his topaz eyes. He chuckled under his breath. "Charlie's home." He said a few minutes later. I grabbed his hand, pulled him to the couch and turned on the TV. Charlie walked in a few minutes later.

"Bella? Edward?" Charlie called as he walked through the door.

"We're in the living room." He popped his head around the door.

"Hey kids, what'cha doing?"

"Nothing just watching TV…" this is as good a time as any to bring up the mom situation. "Mom called for you today."

"Really?" his eye's lit up, then were filled with realization, Edward was shaking a little trying to stifle some giggles I supposed.

"Uh huh, yea she left a message too. It was kind of rambled together she sounded kind of worried. She was freaking out you could say…" I paused for dramatic effect he was going to crack and tell me everything soon anyway I might as well have fun. "Did you say something to her by any chance?"

He was breaking a cold sweat and I knew I had him.

"Well no not anything in particular…um you see I just thought…well maybe she wanted." He gulped, "Well she just needs to know Bells! Ok?" I sighed.

"You didn't even tell me dad. Who's life is it again?" I waited for an answer but knew he wasn't giving me one. "Dad didn't you think there was a reason I waited to tell my own mother I was getting married? I just needed time; this is a touchy subject for her. Geez give me a little credit!"

He sighed. "Sorry Bells I don't know what I was thinking."

"It's ok…I guess." I got my confession I wasn't really angry with him anyway. "Oh yea Billy called, inviting you over."

"Really that's nice." There was clearly relief in his voice he figured he was off the hook and I figured I'd let him off. What's done is done. Now all I can do is wait.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Mom couldn't repress her anticipation for long. You could almost here the anticipation falling out of the seams through her e-mails. That went on for a few weeks and I was in no rush to tell her I knew about all the anticipation in her letters and ask what is was about, I didn't want to tell her as much as she wanted to know. Eventually she couldn't comply with Charlie's wishes any longer. I could tell she was serious when I read the subject of her e-mail. _**TELL ME WHAT"S UP!**_ I gasped this was the moment I've been dreading. Edward was by my side instantaneously.

"What's wrong, Bella?" he sounded anxious; I took a deep breath to reassure him.

"Nothing it's just my mom's email…I don't think she'll be avoiding the subject any longer." I sighed it would be so easy to just sign out of my account and avoid it for a while. But eventually she'd call. "She wants to know what's up. Charlie's got her worried I guess." With another sigh I opened the letter.

Bella I would just like to let you know that I am not a complete idiot. And frankly you and your father are scaring me. Now I want to know what's going on right this minute young lady! I will not stand for this. You never use to keep secrets from me before. Why now?

Her e-mail took on a much lighter tone now.

What could be so bad that you can't tell your mother? Don't worry about it just let me know. You can't even imagine how crazy I'm going thinking up all the worst things that could possibly be wrong. Are you sick? Oh god please tell me you're alright. I love you and I'll be waiting to hear from you. But not for long so you better respond as soon as possible, or I might do something rash.

I love you,

Mom.

"I'm glad I didn't ignore _this. _She won't be waiting much longer." I sighed again; stretching my fingers before I tried to explain to her that I was okay without revealing anything too early.

"What is it?" I smiled he stopped reading e-mails over my shoulder.

"Not much. She thinks I have a fatal disease or something." I shrugged, and started writing.

I'm sorry dad worried you. Really I am he was blowing things way, _way_ out of proportion. There isn't anything wrong I just wanted you to visit. You know come meet my other friends and things like that. And I wanted to tell you something, semi-important but I won't tell you over the phone or e-mail so don't bother asking. Take a deep breath please I know your still freaking out. I can't wait to see you mom I miss you so much. Tell Phil I say hello, and please don't worry I am completely healthy, ok?

I love you and miss you and can't wait to see you.

Bye.

I sighed again, this wasn't going to go well with her, and my mom was never one for the whole waiting thing. She was far too impatient. Edward started rubbing my shoulder.

"It'll be ok. Don't worry so much." How could I not worry?

"I know everything will work out but I can't help but be anxious. I just know her too well. It might get ugly are you sure you want to stick around for the explosion?"

"I wouldn't leave you to face it on your own. After all you didn't ask for this I did. It's only fair that I'm here to bear some of the burden."

He kissed me and my heart flew. He smiled. "That is going to be hard to forget." He said caressing my cheek as I flushed. I smiled I don't think he even realized how abruptly he had changed the subject of our conversation. I don't even think he did it on purpose this time. He smiled back at me brilliantly and it took my breath away, I let a small gasp let out and he kissed me again. He pulled me out of the chair and crushed me against his body. He parted my lips with his and I was completely lost. I slid my hands over his chest and around his neck trying not to make any sudden movements so I could prolong the moment. He didn't seem to pull away as quickly as usual, and my breath was very jagged already, not wanting to repeat any other episodes I pulled away from him and gasped for air. He was breathing hard as well but he just moved his mouth to my neck. My heart was flying out of my chest. I felt my face fall a little as he pulled away.

He smiled at my expression and pulled me to the bed. He laid me on my comforter and carefully placed himself on top of me. He kissed my forehead then laid his head to my heart.

"You can't possibly believe how much I love this sound." He chuckled. "And all I have to do is simply kiss you once. Sometimes it's so hard to stop myself." He gently placed his lips against mine and my heart skipped a beat, he smiled. "You can't possibly know how much restraint it takes for me to let go of you." But yet and still he pulled away, Oh yeah very hard. It was nice to have a chance to breathe though.

"You…have got to be the most random person I have ever met." Changing the subject was good or else I'd be pouting, bad.

"What do you mean by that?"

"The funny thing is you don't even realize it. One minute we're talking about facing my mother, and then you're telling me how you love the sound of my heart pounding. I'm not complaining it's nice to know but it's just something I noticed." I shrugged. "…Just thought you should know." He smiled.

"Being random is a very human quality. So I think my randomness is your fault." After he finished talking he caressed my cheek. "Not that I'm complaining."

Just as that happened the doorbell rung.


End file.
